Today I had my 4th fill and I can't wait to find out if I am finally at restriction. I am officially at 6cc's in a 10cc band. From what I described to my PA she thinks I should be very close if not a little overfilled after this last 1cc today. We shall see tomorrow! Now for the not so good news...I hadn't lost any weight since my last fill about 7 weeks ago. While I can't say I am surprised, I am disappointed. I am not disappointed in my band, I am disappointed in me. In the fact that I have let 6 months slip by with little effort on my part.
Drazil's post yesterday really hit home to me. This is not EASY. I didn't think it would be easy per-se; but easier than it has been, yes. I know the process works, if you work the process. I did not lose 24 pounds by miracle or just because I laid on an operating table for 1 1/2hours and now have a plastic device around my stomach. I have worked hard, just not nearly as consistent as I should be. I try to keep the faith in the moments when I really sit down and think about my progress thus far, and these are the moments when reflection sets in and I vow to do better. Whether that lasts only through my next meal, that is one more meal I will be more conscious of. I just pray I will have more of these moments rather than get "lost" in the everyday and act as if I didn't have surgery at all.
With that, I have been working hard at my daily goal of no drinking while eating. I am proud to say I have been 100% successful at this so far. I have a couple more days to go, and when I reach 7 days in a row without drinking while eating, I will add a new goal. I will keep adding goals every 7 days until I have a stable foundation and can handle more responsibility. I can't say for sure when that will be, but as my new motto goes, I will continue to take it one day at a time.